Christmas is approaching a little too quickly this year, and as usual I have spent my entire wages already on a variety of shiny shoes and 2-for-1 vino. So, my boyfriend and I decided this year we would make each other presents. My artistic skills not being what they once were, I decided to give him a little something extra in the bedroom as a sexy Santa treat.
Knowing what he really wanted, I contemplated the prospect of having to explain to my grandmother why I was having so much difficulty sitting down. I considered the sexy lingerie option, but let's face it, that would involve spending money replacing my old grey knickers with skimpy new ones that cannot actually be worn outside the bedroom. I decided that unless I knew all of his dirty little fantasies I was at a dead end. Let the Porn Raid commence!
After making some rather shocking revelations about exactly what he was getting off on, my heart fell when I heard his key in the lock. Yes, he caught me sitting on the living room floor in my pyjamas surrounded by his collection of porn DVDs and shady magazines. Apparently THAT was the sexiest thing I could have done! Who knew?
As he was so enthralled, I gave him his Christmas present right there and then. I'm not sure if it was the thought of me looking at his porn or the fact that I was willing to go to so much effort to please, but either way he loved it - and I loved his appreciation.
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